Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Who died my cat blue again?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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