There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
