cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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