It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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