some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
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