yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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