I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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