I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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