her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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