And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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