We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
