I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
