Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
