just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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