Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
