ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
