so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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