God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
