There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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