yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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