In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
he thought i was a dude.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
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