it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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