weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
