is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
