Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
