am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
They have beer where we have blood.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
