i may or may not be watching the land before time
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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