one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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