so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
