forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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