you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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