It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
