I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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