Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
