Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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