I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize
