You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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