lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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