she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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