We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
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