Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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