I got chris browned last night
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
