So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
