I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Ketchup is God's man juice
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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