So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
