Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
