Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
it was like his penis was on wheels.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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