I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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