you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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