90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
