I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
