Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
